Lisbet Guerrera: My Past Life


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"Lisbet felt that every living creature, even the tiniest fly, had the right to live its life"

Warning: This section contains mild references to sexual abuse.

A young Lisbet lookalike.

Lisbet Guerrera was born in Ecuador in the first half of 1945, I don't know the exact date, or the exact location, but I'm fairly sure that she travelled in her early years to the place where she would spend the rest of her short life.

For much, if not all of her life, Lisbet was without her mother. I think she may have died in childbirth, if not, then it was shortly after Lisbet was born. Like any child that has lost a parent, this loss would have a huge impact on her life.

I believe Lisbet spent the first half of her life living near a town called Cosanga with her father, who she affectionately called "Papi", which is a popular Spanish nickname for father. She wasn't entirely without any famly in Cosanga, her grandmother lived in the town and I have one or two happy memories of our visits to see her. I remember her showing me how to bake bread.

Lisbet was a very shy girl, she was also very caring and respectful of the people that surrounded her, in that aspect of her life, she was very adult like in her attitude towards life, which she cared about a great deal, whichever form it was in. For example, I have fond memories of Lisbet gently holding a butterfly with a torn wing in her cupped hands, memories of her overcoming her fear to help an injured lizard, also memories of her feeling sorry for a bird locked up in a tiny cage, and wanting to set it free. Lisbet felt that every living creature, even the tiniest fly, had the right to live its life, a trait that she took with her to my life today.

A dwelling place similar to that where Lisbet lived with her father

Lisbet had a reasonably good upbringing by her father. As a farmer, he did the best that he could to provide for her, and she never went without food or clothes. He loved her very much, but unfortunately, he had a rather cruel streak in him that would often see him taking his frustrations out on her. But she always remained compassionate towards him, and she could only ever see the good in him, even though he could be quite cruel. This came to a climax one night when he sexually abused her as she lay in her bed, and even then she just laid there and endured it because she didn't want to disappoint him, and because she led such a sheltered life, she wasn't even sure if what he was doing was wrong.

At some point in her life, Lisbet and her father relocated further south. The exact location doesn't appear to have a name, because it was literally in the middle of nowhere. To the east was the fateful volcano, and to the west there was the tiny village of Guamote. My memories become a bit jumbled here because I know that Lisbet had a few friends, and I have memories of playing with some of them in the Yanayacu river near Cosanga. I also made a few friends in our new location, but I've saved those memories for another section.

Lisbet spent most of her time either playing, or carrying out her daily chores, which included washing the clothes, fishing, picking fruits and berries etc. She also had a form of education, but it was nothing like the daily school lessons that we are used to. I think Lisbet attended one long lesson at irregular intervals, where she learnt practical things that would be of use to her in her everyday life.

Guamote on market day

Every week, Lisbet and her father, and sometimes a few friends, would load up the home made cart with items such as fruit, farm products, vegetables etc. and then travel by donkey to the market in Guamote to trade.

There wasn't much else to do, so she had to make her own entertainment with her father. I don't have many memories of our recreational activities, but I do remember that we had playing cards, which we would often play outside of our hut in front of an open fire until the sun went down. Then Papi would get his pipes out and play, while I laid back and watched the stars come out to the soothing music. Lisbet never needed anything more than this to make her happy and content with her life.
Over the next few chapters, I will go into more detail on the different aspects of Lisbet's life that I've mentioned above. My thoughts and feelings on my previous life as Lisbet will be backed up with entries from my journal, which I started to write when I began meditating in 2006 (the journal entries will appear in this text format)